Went outing wif zhu zaii

17th Nov 2010 zhu zaii n i went outing together at DPC from abt 6pm+ (alomost 7pm) to around 9:45pm we went there to eat dinner together n walk walk lo :]
While we were eating we saw ke wen n her 2 fren n her bf n zhun hua n yu chuan at DPC too. zhu zaii n we were sweet too ya :]
but we also got abit 7 xin, coz tat zhu zaii kept dancing n playing around xD

the standing up (left) is me n the sitting down (right) is zhu zaii lo :]
My hand kena cut kept bleeding n tat plaster was zhu zaii's 1 XD *the ring n all the bangles zhu zaii also got xD
Dono when take ardy, my perasan pic xD *the watch from the pic at right hand zhu zaii also got. We got alot lot couple things leh xD

dono y feel like posting a bloggie.

now feel smiling outside pain inside. Zhu zaii n i starts to have some problem, n all those problem is bcoz of me. I admit tat all those problem is bcoz of me, i'm sorry. maybe i'm the 1 he likes la, but until now i dono wat he likes from me. everythings tat i hav done he also don really likes, so i still left which 1 tat he likes? sometimes really funny la, ok, i know tat sometimes i'm crazy, den he likes me when i'm crazy, but i'm not crazy all the time wo. so how? i feel tat sumtimes he likes all those girl vry shu nv type de, but i don really think tat he will likes it, coz bcoz tis kinda girl, he will feels tat i'm not zhu dong enough, or he will feels tat everything i think i don dare to say out, or he will feels tat wif me vry boring coz i'm too girl type ardy, or he will feels tat i don really likes him after all, i can be tat shu nv type, but will he likes it? who knows? maybe i will start to try being shu nv again, den c wats he said bah, i also dono wat he really likes from me. Sometimes i think vry negative something tat when he say out his problem abt me i will feel tat when we were just friends we will hav fun together, but when we couple problems start to come out, don hav tat FUN anymore, y not just be friends? juz tou tou an lian each other lo. But i'm too selfish ardy, coz i don wan to let others got chance n i wan him to be mine so i don wan him to leave me, n he leave me maybe i will suffer again? haiz, all tis also bcoz wat i wan, i don dare to ask him do he still wan to couple if is like tis, coz i really scare to hear tat he regret couple wif me, i don wan him to leave me, tis is my big big problem! DON DARE TO ACCEPT THE TRUTH! When everytimes he tells me tat he loves me, i really hope tat is really from his heart n not juz say for MUST, coz every single word of a guy tat i love saying 'I LOVE YOU' it really changes me or it really touch me. Tis is my big weakness nia @.@
But i really hope tat we won be like start being cold each other, coz i know end up is juz 1 ending call BREAK UP.

ok, after the refresh better ardy, stop crying ardy :]
you know when do zhu zaii n i pak toh ma? 9th nov 10:02pm at genting leh, 9 is my lucky number, n our time is like 9,10,11 - 9 for 9th, 10 for 10pm n 11 for Nov. Very...funny ho? kekex, maybe is god set up jor bah. xD
being juz a normal girl is also hard sumtimes, so i wan to be diffren than the others, especially in his heart. sumtimes i know tat my emotion really too over jor, but i dare to show out infront of a guy tat i love really daring jor, coz i know myself, i don dare to show my bad mood or unhappy mood to sum1 i love, but not for zhu zaii leh, i dare to show infront of him n i let him tam me when i'm not happy leh, tis 1 really let me know tat showing a expression to a guy i love is just tat easy n i no ned to hide anymore, coz last time i sad i always gao tim myself de, don wan my bf to tam me until i happy de, but too sad is, my emotion makes zhu zaii feel sad wo, so should i use back my way leh? hahax! my big big problem AGAIN.. xD
ok la, maybe tell him bah, but don show infront of him lo,kekex, like tat he won be sad lo :]
But nowadays i don get his heart n he don get my heart ardy, dono y leh xD
*i also dono wat my heart really wan also*
juz now i said tat 'refresh' means tat i go eat sumthings xD n 1st time when i think of zhu zaii i feel pain n sour in my heart same as i felt for ham, i don wan tat to happen again leh, i juz wan tat when i think of him, i feel like laughing or i giv myself a smile. Maybe i tat time still vry NEGATIVE bah xD
No matter wat happen to us, i still also love zhu zaii the only 1, kekex ^^

:]

went bak early today. so free to post a bloggie :]

-9th nov-
tat day i went to genting wif sieng n qian, but zhu nvr go coz he got class. so we went by vry early abt 10am++ reach there. den we meet sieng's bf-ah lun n his frens, den we juz walk around 2gether 1st lo. aiyo, lazy type abt wat i play there, say abt zhu zaii bah xD
at around 6pm zhu zaii suddenly called me, n ask me whr m i, n he said tat he was really sad tat he could not come to genting n said he was in 1u wif frens. but suddenly he appear infront of at 'da ji chang' i was like stun ardy, n ask, y r you here? n in tat moment my mind was all in blank n touch too. coz he wei le me come up to genting. den we hav dinner together n wif sieng too, coz sieng wif her bf chao jia jor, so she don wan go up hotel xin, so she hav dinner wif us lo :]
after the dinner zhu zaii n i bring her bak to ah lun's room lo, den we 2 go walk walk lo :]
we walk alot of places at last we went outside n chat. outside was damn cold but dono y i won really feel cold when i'm wif zhu zaii. we chat n laugh n i 1st time c a 'diffren' kinda boy, he dance infront of me n jump n talk alot in 1 breath, wa...really geng ar he. we sit outside there from 9:30pm to abt 11pm n when 10:02pm he gao bai wif me, he asked 'qiu, ni ke yi zuo wo nv peng you ma?' i said 'na wo wen ni, ni ke yi zuo wo nan peng you ma?' den he gently kiss me at my lips n said 'wo yuan yi, na ni ne? ni yuan yi zuo wo nv peng you ma?' den i also gently kiss him at his lips n said 'wo yuan yi' den i suddenly said 'ok, now c wat time, 10:02pm..ok, zai 10:02pm wo zhen shi zuo ni nv peng you, 9th nov 10:02pm wo men zhen shi zai yi qi le' den we smile to each other n start to chat abt other things. he said alot alot of his UNHAPPY things n he jump around n i looked at him n i was really cold n i nvr tell him, bec i know tat when i person was unhappy is good to be in a cold places. den abt 11pm tat time i asked him 'r you cold? i'm vry cold ardy' den he said 'i'm also vry cold, ok, let go in' we two like soh po n soh lou quickly walk inside n i was really cold until i was shivering ardy n i told him n he tried to make me feel warm by kept holding my hand, put hot air in my hand n giv me his scarf. i know tat he was also vry cold n i kept said tat i don wan, you take la. but end up he still giv me n i kept hold at my hand, we two quickly walk to my hotel room. when i walk into my room no 1 in there, juz we two. n tat time i'm still abit cold so zhu zaii asked me to sit down n he asked me to touch his neck bec his neck was really warm, but i know tat he was really cold ardy if i still take his warmness he sure beh tahan de, so i try to take of my hand but he don let my hands go, so i juz follow wat he said lo. after few min den i felt not tat cold ardy, so we play in the room for awhile, juz we two only but i tot tat if a girl n a boy in a room together they will be doing things tat they won do outside. but zhu zaii n i nvr wo, we two juz playing like kids, den suddenly sieng came in to our room n saw us playing xD
but tat time she was in a bad mood so we two tried to make her happy lo. den qian came in too, then we juz chat around lo. abt 11:30pm zhu zaii needs to go off ardy, his fren want to go jor, but dono when my chest starts to feel cold n like pain like too cold ardy, but i juz tahan n company zhu zaii to his fren there, so i juz tahan until he went bak lo, he looked like bu she de, he kept said he wan to overnite wif me, i also wanted him to company me but i know tat he was really tired ardy + he got clas on the next day so i don let n asked him to go bak, after he went bak i hold sieng's arm n said 'sieng, my chest vry pain, i vry cold, pui me to buy sumthing hot' den sieng juz quickly pui me to buy a hot milo n kept asked me 'y you don tell him? r you still ok?' den i said'i don wan tell him bec i know tat he will worry n don wan go bak de, so i don wan tell him' but in the room tat time sieng go n tell him ardy, n i juz kept said 'i'm ok don worry.' but slowly ok jor...
dono wat to say ardy.....SKIPPP..

-11th nov-
zhu zaii fetch me home ma, i buy alot things from genting abt 6 stuff lo. n i buy 1 POLO watch for him, n i went to jusco to make the blade den after tat i was thinking tat i should giv him a suprize, so i asked him 'whr is yr car? giv me yr car keys' den he point at his car den i said 'ok now you stand here, don see ar, of not i don choi you de ar' i quickly walk to his car n put all those present at his sit, tis is my 1st time giving a present to a guy like tis, after tat i start his car n i sit in his car den miss call him den he slowly walk to his car n c all those present n he kept laughing n said 'thank you lao po' den i juz smile at him n said 'no ned thanks la' den he gently kiss me at my lips n we touch nose to nose :]
after tat he da bao me dinner n fetch me home lo :]

zhu zaii, really thank you all the stuff you did for me, i'm really touch, sumtimes i don tell out or show out if i'm been touch bec i dono how to tell you i'm touch xD
but really thank you :]
B.B.W.Y.Z.H.A.N.D.W.M.

my off day.

walau, last few days i was working from morning until late nite, so not really hav time to bloggie, but today was my off day, so i just wanted to blog 1 post :]

-MY WORK-
i work here for 128hrs ardy, i feel really happy for my work coz juz face all those kids wif cutie face. n the workers there was really friendly too, n when we were working we kept laughing, bcoz sure got sum1 make us laugh. most of the time is ah gan, he is a indian but he can talk chinese n cantonese, bcoz he is a mix, his father is a indian + mother is a chinese = child is a mix xD
i really get fun in tat work, although i work there until late nite vry tired, but i really enjoy. :]
Hahax! havnot said yet were i work. i work at 1u[new wing], a shop name GET CRAFTY, is teaching kids how to make art n craft. When got go 1u rmb cum find me ar! alot ppl visit me b4, like, dai lou de "gang", alvin de "gang", zhu zaii's biao mei [shi ming] n most often cum n find me de ZHU ZAII! xD

-ZHU ZAII-
hahax! if you ask me to think abt him i can juz only laugh, dono y?! now our relationship really complicated, also dono we r couple jor leh, or havnot de. Alot ppl also ask, but i juz answer them 'dono, tat y my fb put complicated lo.' but not for zhu zaii, he straight a way said 'yes, she is my lou po.' coz i feel tat he havnot really ask yet but we were like couple ardy so..@.@ blur jor.
But nvm la, for now he treat me vry goodie ardy xD he cook porridge for me leh, n put in the thermos giv me aft my work means for my DINNER! xD it was really touch dou, n i ate all!! wkaka! really nice + i was really hungry. 1st time i eat dou so nice n sweet de porridge. but i think so tis kinda porridge outside cannot find ardy, only he can make dou. but for now i ate b4 he cook the noodle [Maggi] + the sweet porridge, the porridge really put lot of 'liao' xD
Although we were sweet now, but we feel dou we lack of 1 kinda feel leh. until now i also dono wat feel. maybe time will show me wats the feel i lack of bah. n got 1 time i really felt tat i treat him vry bad, maybe bcoz ham treat me like tis b4 makes me don believe boys ardy, i really felt sorry n kept blaming myself how i treat you. it was really pain when getting hurt, tat y chance i hardly giv you. But now i'm trying to believe you n slowly giv you chance vry often ardy wa. kekex^^

-HAM-
if now you ask me to look bak, dono y 1st i think abt how he hurt me badly. i really dono y. yea, i know tat we were sweet b4, but if now you ask me to look bak, i will feel hurt n pain in there deeply. i want to let go tat pain, so i just go on n don look bak ardy.abt his skype p.m. b4 the present 1 he wrote 'zhi dao ni xin li you wo, yi qie yi jing bu zhong yao le' n for now he wrote 'cheng jin you yi zhen zhi de ai qingwo mei you zhen xi, zhi dao xiao shi le wo cai ao hui, ru guo gei wo yi chi yi hui,wo bu hui rang ta liu zou,ru guo yao zai zhe ge ai qing fang shang yi ge qi xian, wo xi wang shi yi wan nian, ru guo yao fang shang yi ju hua, wo hui shuo wo ai ni' i see jor dono y don feel like laughing ardy, like vry serious ardy. i know tat he knows tat he was wrong but chance i hav given ardy i given many many times ardy, but he juz like watching a movie, play finish den like dono ardy juz watch its go only. i sick of tired tat he treat me like tis, ardy 1 year he treat me like tis. but i still don leave his heart until now. I'm tired only me kept struggle in there. Dono y only zhu zaii is the 1 can pull me out from there. n he was really diffren from ham. Totally diffren. Ham really hurt me vry badly b4, is juz like he take a sword n poke through my heart, it was really damn pain + he pull it out hardly made it more pain, bleeding n swollen ardy. Chance is juz like i'm giving he the medicine but he just push it away n sumtimes even touch my swollen part, makes me feel hurt n pain. But now i'm recovering bcoz maybe i'm tired to giv him again, so i gave him the medicine n he willing to help me. i tired to giv two person b4, but tat two person made me kept bak my medicine, 4got y ardy. Now zhu zaii help me until almost recover ardy. really thank to him alot lot. he did all those is like he should de, but is not, is he willing to do, i really felt touch abt tat, n i really fell tat being love tat 'xing fu' de feelings again.

-FAMILY-
Nowadays i'm working so less time wif family n zhu zaii, but i still try my best to pull out time to company him n no matter i work until how late how tired, i also will sacrifice my sleeping time or my resting time to company him, dono y xD n i work bcoz i felt tat wat i want den just take money from my parents, like tis makes me felt shame tat y i work + 50% of my selary i'm not gonna touch it bcoz is for my family de. tat another 50% is only for me, tat y i work so hard ma xD

Okeys, dono wat to type or say sum more le leh, think dou or feel like saying only say la. :]

tuesday again @@

2day zhu zaii fetch me bak take de xD
today we went to our 'old place' :]
n we were vry SWEET ^3^

Okeys, the story was like tis, i work at 11am my dad fetch me like usual lo, den i finish early means 6pm, so i was thinking tat i can take tis chance to see zhu zaii, so i ask me c whether he can or want to fetch me mou lo. den he accepct jor, so he fetch me bak home lo. abt 5:30pm i saw him pass by my working place, n he was early so he juz waited me outside the shop lo. After i cum out, i saw him siting there,his back was facing me n he was talking in phone so wanted to giv him a kiss at his cheek after the phone, but once he off his phone he c dou me jor, so i juz act tak tahu n said tat i wan go toilet lo, bec tat time i ardy wan to toilet ardy. When i cum out, i saw him still back facing me, so i try again to kiss him at his cheek. hahax! success jor xD! den we juz walk until to his car lo, den in car tat time he ask me wan go our OLD place mou, den i was thinking tat still got time ma go awhile lo. den we reached there, we saw a couple in sweet n it was leng luii n leng zaii o. After tat we cum down from the car den juz walk around in sweet sweet lo :]
While walking we also kept playing like soh po n soh lou xD n we kept zhat each other. It was really fun, den abt 7:30pm we when bak to his car bcoz i'm having dinner at home so i ned to go bak to hav my dinner. But b4 he drove his car, sieng's bf called n asked abt the genting things. Then tat zhu zaii, go n make those sounds like we r 'MAKING',so his bf ask 'you all 'MAKE' finish jor mei? den i said, 'weih, low zhi hao! diam diam!' den he continue wo, so i juz kept hit him n laugh lo, coz his sound really make ppl 'wu hui' xD den her bf beh tahan kap phone ardy + i don really feel like settle those things so also ned thank piggy de :]
but too sad, sieng called after that den tat zhu zaii ar, kacau again n tou ting wat sieng n i said, he was really funny xD
den sieng asked me to settle the problem lo, so i juz only can 'sallow' the problem by myself lo. i was really pressure ardy, work + my hse work + my mummy work + zhu zaii competition + tis GENTING problem + sieng n her bf problem. i was really pressure, but zhu zaii c dou jor, n kept tam me happy lo, but dono y he did it jor wo xD in car from bad mood > HAPPY MOOD :]
after tat he only started his car to drive me bak home. On the way bak he also kept 'tam-ing' me. xD When almost reach my hse, i asked him to stop 1 side, bcoz i feel tat i'm really tired to 'sallow' problems by myself, so i juz wanted a bigg nice n warm huggie. so i juz hug him in the car n my head was in his chest n i can feel tat his heart beat was really fast, after tat long huggie, i look at his n giv him a kiss at his lips, then [kekex^^,paiseh..] but lucky his ham sap hand nvr cum out la, if not i sure stop de xD
after tat only he continue drive me home, dono y when i go back i feel tat all my pressure gone ardy, like given to him ardy. n 1st time i feel dou 'an quan gan' from a guy. Last time in every huggie i don really feel, tis time i really feel dou from his hug, feel vry warm, been protect,get to trust him n most importantly is in tat hug i feel dou tat no matter wat happen got you LOW ZHI HAO i will be fine :]
Funny 1st time @.@